May 2013
ipoog:
egberts:
what if you cracked an egg while you were cooking and a chicken fell out
vocodex:
my mom once told me that writing your feelings down or drawing them out is very therapeutic and relaxing
mspgay:
snorlaxatives:
snorlaxatives:
aaaaalrighty-then:
snorlaxatives:
why is being alive so expensive
You spelled “suck” wrong.
???????????????????????????????
i literally can’t even tell what you’re trying to say
why is being alive so suck
why is being alive suck
why is suck
suck is being alive so expensive
why suck so expensive
?????
murkurlur:
augustuswtrs:
artistic-therapist:
augustuswtrs:
people who call vaginas ‘vajayjay’
you think you got problems my sister calls them ‘vajigglyjags’
vadidgeridoos
tongues-on-fire:
iwillincendiotheheartoutofyou:
I literally have no idea what my personality is
Like I go from being an arrogant bitch to a studious, conscientious hard-worker, to a lazy procrastinator, to an overly-emotional fangirl
In a matter of seconds
so accurate it hurts
meladoodle:
*jury voice* we find the defendant guilty! “i know you are but what am i?” *jury is immediately under arrest*
stevenfresco:
“we’re having pizza for dinner”
occasional-awesomeness:
hunjeok:
How did I end up with so many ships, jesus christ
At first it was like
and now it’s just like
#the giant one is my otp
keithmoom:
“knock knock”
“who’s there”
“the”
“the who?”
“YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH *instrument explodes*”
mycroft-holmes-approves:
sodamnrelatable:
Diet ideas: Eat whatever you want, and if anyone tries to lecture you about your weight, eat them too.
illegolas:
why is a girl smoking considered soft grunge
why is anything considered soft grunge
what is soft grunge
deansass:
thefallengarrison:
DO YOU EVER CAS SO MUCH YOU DEAN BUT THEN YOU DEAN SO MUCH YOU SAM
It’s sad that this makes sense
cokeflow:
A blind man walks into a bar and a table and a chair
dirtyalec:
sometimes I close my eyes and I can’t see
dekutree:
there’s this guy that looks just like will.i.am at my school and i whisper “let the beat rock” every time he passes me and he always just looks around trying to find who said it
hitlervevo:
hitlervevo:
today i learned that you can text the police if you’re dead
NO NO NO I MEANT IF YOU’RE DEAF OMFG
my-tardis-sense-is-tingling:
dylanquents:
have you ever been so wildly attracted to someone that you can actually feel your heart rotting just because you know you’ll never get a chance with them
run-cause-hitler:
enayalate-h8-this-year:
bbanditt:
slett:
winchestercodependency:
ibecameacat:
what if all your fingers just turned into tongues… like what would you even do
dude people with vaginas would have the best time getting off
“People with vaginas”
what are those called again
I can’t remember
this is what yahoo payed 1.1billion dollars for
simoncowell:
niallhoran:
louistomlinson:
zaynmalik:
liampayne:
harrystyles:
baby
you
light
up
my
god shut up u lil shits
starksexual:
i was at the bus stop with my sister the other day and for no apparent reason, she says: ‘dude, there are more dead people in the world than living people’ and the woman standing beside me whispered ‘holy shit’ and i fucking lost it
pizza:
*uses snapchat text bar to cover double chin*
